I make my living flying around the world, talking to women about how to take control of their money so they can afford their dream life. My friend Dylan was courting a lady. The relationship was fairly new. She had other plans. She mentioned that she was hungry. He offered to take her for some fast food or something quick.
These clues can pop up in conversations ranging from upcoming vacation plans to how to split the check. For a comprehensive list of top money conversations to have in those early dating days and beyond check out my free cheat sheet of the 25 money talks money talks every couple needs to have!
Money and dating
I get that diving into real money talk as your relationship progresses can be a little bit uncomfortable…. But is it really any more awkward than getting naked in front of each other for the first time?
Big-picture talks about goals and dreams are the perfect way to initiate a meaningful financial dialogue. You can naturally shift these conversations from aspirational dream-discussions to tactical how-to talks.
For example, a conversation about a future dream home while watching an episode of Fixer Upper on HGTV can shift into a practical dialogue about projected timelines and savings for a down payment.
For some, that point may come after a month of dating. For others it might be 6 months in.
4 Ways To Talk About Money When You're Dating
And for some, it might be when you move in together. At its heart though, the commitment point is the moment you decide you want to have a serious future with your partner and they feel the same way.
As you start digging in, be on the lookout for any financial details that might require a discussion. For example, vastly different incomesdebt loads or bad credit can all point to broader conversations around money that need to had.
Essentially, any financial detail that has the potential to affect both of you needs to be discussed. Not only will disclosing your financials help the two of you figure out what kinds of things you can afford to do together — vacations you can take, apartments you can afford to live in, etc.Dating Girls With No Money @Hodgetwins
I know the idea of baring your full financial picture can feel totally overwhelming, and maybe even a little embarrassing. This is especially true if you decide to move in together or make a major purchase together, as banks and lenders may pull financial information from both of you.
If your partner fears judgment or shame around their money habits, you can help them open up by sharing your own financial fears and mistakes. If your partner has significant debt, what caused them to go into debt, what are they doing to pay it off and what are their feelings about it? The process of full financial disclosure can be a valuable way to make sure your values, priorities and expectations align, especially as you move forward in your relationship.
The only true deal breakers are refusals to share financial information, a complete lack of willingness to change bad financial habits, shaming or blaming around money decisions, and flat out dismissiveness of requests to talk money.
For a full list of money conversations you should be having at every stage of your relationship, check out my free cheat sheet of the 25 money talks money talks every couple needs to have! Thanks so much Liz!
So many opportunities to get a sense of someones spending and financial outlook from day 1! I agree about the talk. I had goals to accomplish! Yes, it is very important to talk about money in your relationships… Several of my failed relationships failed because of a very different perspective on money which at the end of the day is about how you use your resources and how you priorities.
What do men really think about money and dating and what should be your approach to financial topics as your relationships evolve?.
Just be honest with what you want to do and spend on. For example, I remember when I wanted to experiment with bitcoins a while back and I told Judy my partner about my desire. She was okay with it as long as I used money that was not a part of our budgeting and financing calendars.
I then had to sell my electronics at the pawn shop to start LOL. But honesty is what worked for me, since we share our financials.
Some couples re-evaluate dating and money as various life factors pop up, like when rent goes up or one person gets a raise. There's no single. There comes a point when new couples have to talk about the dirtiest subject – money. Read our advice on surviving your first fight about money. Lately I've been getting asked a lot of questions about dating and money. More specifically, I've been getting asked how to talk about money.
Thanks for the article.!!!! Great Post!
This is such an important topic and so hard for some people. For me it is definitely uncomfortable to talk about with my girlfriend but these points are a must! Thank you for this post! My fiance learned about my finances when I was featured on Dave Ramsey.
Partners, be it spouses,dating, or engaged must be on the same page so communication about finances is an absolute must. Both must agree on a plan or there will be issues.
Being in a relationship with someone who has more money than you can Dating someone wealthier can cause a strain on your relationship. You found a girl that you like, but you do not have the job and the money. You wonder if this relationship can work without money? If you end up. Go on dates with generous men or women and get paid in cash for your time. With ProDate you can make money dating and earn a few hundred or thousands .
Very insightful advice. Money is a big determinant in the success of unions between couples and the topic should, therefore, never be taken lightly. You really brought the point home. This goes along with the point we just made about bringing up certain subjects too soon.
New relationship tips: the first money problem
Money is a heavy topic, so give yourself some time to get deeper into the courtship. Talk about whether or not going to dinner tonight fits within your budget, for example. Once the subject is on the table and the two of you have had some fun with it, maybe talk a little more in detail. Neither person should get too specific with their numbers until they are comfortable doing so. If the other person is pushing hard for information or wants a lot of your data, step back.
When you have a conversation going, get and give a sense of what both of you think about saving long-term, investing, planning for retirement, and giving. No two people are going to agree about everything—and that goes double for money.
You have spenders and savers, Nerds and Free Spirits. But if one or both of you refuses to budge on your stance, that could change an orange flag to a red one. It might mean a point of contention within marriage, which is never good.
Dave talks about the importance of discussing money before getting married. But what about one step before that: How do you talk about it when you're still. For a comprehensive list of top money conversations to have in those early dating days (and beyond) check out my free cheat sheet of the 25 money talks money. Love and money can be a toxic mix. Whether you're currently on the lookout for your perfect match or you've already sealed the deal, beware of sneaky financial .
You can talk about it and learn more about them. How did you bring up the topic of money with your significant other?